** This thread discusses the content article: Respite **

Very solid. I do have a bit of an issue with the formatting of the first stanza, because you've got some great lines that are sort of obscured by the top-heavy chunk of text. I really like this line:

the dogs barking communiqués
that only empathy understands,

But it only popped for me on the 3rd read. Since apparently I'm on a tear with line spacing today, here's an example of how you could bring out the heavy hitters in that stanza - please note, not a rewrite, just an illustration of technique.


Sometimes

I like to sit back
and watch the sky fall:

the afternoon lullaby
of nearby traffic

playing with the laughter
of neighborhood children;

the dogs barking communiqués
that only empathy understands,
language rooted in the purest feeling;

the wind chimes sing
with the slow breeze

as insects crawl thru the bark
looking to escape the sun.

Basically, the idea is to give the reader enough space to absorb each image/meme under its own terms (one reason why haiku can be so particularly effective).

One other suggestion I'd have is to nix

language rooted in the purest feeling;

You've already established this with the previous line, and it comes off as a bit patronizing. Aside from that, though, I think the language works very well, and the sense of peace and relaxation that permeates the work is lovely.

Beautifully written - thanks!

I really like the idea of spacing . . . I usually brick things together . . . a new toy to play with perhaps

And nixing the language line makes the spacing flow better with each stanza being two lines each.

Thank you for the ideas